The Chronic Pain Couple Self-Paced Program
Whether it’s an occasional flare-up of pain that hijacks your weekends or an all-consuming condition that’s with you every waking moment, the toll is undeniable.
Even if you’re just starting to journey down the road of chronic illness and chronic pain or you’ve been on a search for cure for years, know this: the future of your relationship could depend on the insights you’re about to discover.
Chronic pain doesn't just inflict physical torment, it becomes an uninvited third wheel, forever altering the dynamics of relationships. Casting shadows over once-joyful moments, turning shared laughter and dreams into distant echoes.
You're not alone in this heart-wrenching journey.
A staggering 1 in 5 adults grapple with chronic pain.
And that number rises to 1 in 3 among older individuals. Yet these statistics barely scratch the surface of the emotional toll it takes - especially on relationships.
You catch yourself looking at “regular” couples with a mix of envy and longing, yearning for all the simple little things they take for granted.
The hobbies and interests you once cherished together are now distant memories.
Conversations, once filled with dreams and laughter, are now dominated by doctor's appointments, medications, and the ever-present question: "How are you feeling today?"
Dinners at a favorite restaurant or an impromptu weekend getaway turn into canceled plans because of a flare-up, fatigue, or the sheer dread of another pain-filled outing.
Chronic pain doesn’t just challenge the body, it strains the heart. It creates an emotional chasm, pulling couples apart when they need each other the most.
Whether you’re the one in pain or the one watching a loved one suffer, the pain reverberates through the relationship.
How has chronic pain impacted
your relationship? What did you lose?
For my husband, Johann, and I, the impact was far-reaching. Nights were the hardest. We’d sit side by side, silenced by exhaustion. My fatigue was unlike anything I'd ever known. And Johann? He was drained from caring for me more than he cared for himself. We had nothing left to give each other. Only a vague hope that we could someday get back to “normal. But as you’ll find out in a moment…
It doesn’t have to be that way.
You see, while we once felt lost, today, Johann and I are living testament to a relationship that's not just surviving, but thriving. And countless other couples have used the same proven strategies to transform relationships dominated by chronic pain.
Now, you might be thinking, 'Sure, a great relationship sounds wonderful, but I'm too drained for new strategies.' I've been there. Buried under duvets, overwhelmed by fatigue, searching for answers.
But here's the truth: Whether you're facing Multiple Sclerosis, Fibromyalgia, Crohn's, Arthritis, Migraines, Cancer treatment, or any other pain-inducing condition…
There are practical, research-backed strategies that can breathe life back into your relationship and reclaim that spark. Strategies that don't demand all your energy or time, especially when you feel like you have neither.
Hi, I’m Karra Eloff
I’m an author, international speaker, tv show guest panelist, and co-founder of 2 psychology clinics.
But there’s one thing I never anticipated adding to that list:
Chronic pain sufferer.
If you met us today, you'd see a couple radiating joy. So much so that it's hard to believe the journey we've been on.
But if you were to turn back the clock 6 years, you'd see a very different picture.
When we got married, we built an exciting relationship around world travel, being fitness fanatics, and keen adventure seekers. We were loving, affectionate and laughed a lot.
And then one day it all changed.
I remember it vividly. While out furniture shopping, as I walked toward my husband I collapsed. He rushed over to me and told me “it will be okay.” But it wasn’t okay. And it still isn’t. Initially, doctors believed it was a running injury. But after 3 long years of physio and treatment - nothing changed.
The diagnosis finally came:
Spondyloarthritis. A type of arthritis that inflames the spine and pelvis and other joints. For added fun, it also results in enthesitis - which inflames ligament and tendons, and has affected various organs.
I had to quit my job as a Speech Pathologist. I couldn’t run anymore. We couldn’t do the things we used to do together.
But it wasn’t just my body that had grown weak. Our relationship had too.
I still remember some nights when the pain and fatigue were so high we just ate in silence - looking at each other, Johann feeling hopeless not knowing how to help and I was riddled with guilt because I couldn't be the vibrant partner I was without the health battles.
Daily gym sessions together were a distant memory…
Suitcases were gathering dust…
The deep bond we once reveled in felt as though it was fading by the day.
Everything I dreamed for our life together had been snatched from my grasp.
If you’re reading this, I have a feeling you understand the depth of what I’m saying.
We were so problem-focused, exhausted, and everything was just…
"It'll be better after…"
Sound familiar? So many couples find themselves here.
It’ll be better after the diagnosis.
It’ll be better after the next treatment.
You get stuck waiting for the cure while your relationship and dreams are sitting on the shelf collecting cobwebs.
Soon enough doctors confirmed what we feared most…
My health problems didn’t have a quick fix. In fact, soon after I was diagnosed with two more conditions - endometriosis and adenomyosis (pelvic conditions) - each further intensifying my pain.
As crushing as it was to learn the meaning of ‘chronic’, Johann and I refused to accept that same fate for our relationship as well. So each night I’d just research research research - who can help me be a great wife, have a great relationship, and be joyful again despite the pain?
The most I could find was a few books and articles on “how to survive pain and sustain a relationship” - but they failed to deliver what I needed. And I don’t know about you, but “survive”? That’s not something I wanted to settle for. We had a remarkable relationship and we wanted that back.
The fact you’re reading this page tells me you want a joyful, fulfilling relationship again, too.
So, having exhausted all other options, I turned to academic research.
Diving deep into the libraries of the University of Queensland, I began to find answers buried in the
latest pain and psychology journals.
I’d try out every practical strategy I could muster the energy for. I started looking at strategies clients were being given at our psychology clinics, and how they could be adapted to a person with pain and their chosen human. And in less time than you’d expect, the magic began to happen.
I stumbled upon a glaring gap in the global treatment model for chronic pain. And with these discoveries, we were able to return joy to our love life, well our whole life, despite chronic pain.
My husband and I hacked not just our relationship, but our life as a whole. We knew what the problems actually were. I knew the solutions. And we got into this cool dance where we didn’t even have to talk about anything health-related anymore…
Imagine that.
The topic that once had dominated our conversations had taken a backseat to the rest of our life.
And since we didn’t even need to talk about it we had that joy and space back again.
The missing piece in your chronic pain treatment
As I went through the research, one thing became clear.
The treatment model in the United States, Australia, and across the globe is missing a key piece of the puzzle.
Here it is:
You need PRACTICAL strategies for addressing the COUPLE.
That’s right. Not just the partner in pain.
After all, the supporting partner has had their life turned upside down too.
Let’s be real: they lose so much too.
They often let go of social connections because they feel guilty going out to enjoy time with friends when their partner is suffering at home alone.
Or the activities like sports or the gym, it’s so common they quit in solidarity.
They didn’t see their life like this either.
Yet they are seen AS the support, completely neglecting the fact that THEY need support just as much.
I was invited as the Keynote Speaker for a Pain Society conference earlier this year, and the speaker who followed me said this:
“All the research is pointing toward ‘we gotta look at the couple,’ so basically, my summary is: let’s listen to Karra and what she’s doing.”
In fact, there was a relationship counselor who came to me, let’s call her Sarah. Sarah had tried everything in her repertoire for her own relationship but it wasn’t working. She needed UNIQUE, PRACTICAL Solutions.
After teaching her the strategies…
She was amazed by how quickly things changed for her. She told me “this was the missing piece” that transformed her relationship.
And believe me, once you have these strategies, people really start to notice the transformation.
In fact, people couldn’t help but ask.
They had to know why, even on days I had just gotten out of hospital, Johann and I were more affectionate and in love than even the most able-bodied couples.
Their curiosity led me to begin sharing our strategies, dig deeper into research and eventually write my book The Chronic Pain Couple.
But the book was just the beginning.
I began working 1-on-1 with couples and partners with pain, guiding them from despair to hope, from isolation to connection. Every session, every story, every tear, and every smile further refined my approach.
Incorporating insights from my own journey, feedback from these sessions, and the latest treatments in my two psychology clinics.
At this point, countless couples are now enjoying the relationship they thought they had lost forever - rediscovering intimacy, joy, and connection no matter their pain.
Can you imagine what it's going to feel like when you and your partner can enjoy those simple moments again?
When you can hold hands, feeling the strength of your bond…
Share a laugh and feel genuine joy no matter what point you’re at on the treatment journey…
Waking up next to your partner, feeling truly connected and excited for another day together…
Or simply be present with each other without any reservations?
What was once a beacon of hope for couples has evolved into a lighthouse, guiding you through the stormiest nights of chronic pain.
And I've distilled all of this wisdom, experience, and proven strategies into a comprehensive course called...
Introducing the
Chronic Pain Couple
Self-Paced Program
This program is designed with you in mind, focusing on high-leverage, practical strategies that can make a significant impact on your relationship and day-to-day life. Especially on those days when time and energy are in short supply.
You won't be sifting through endless research papers or wading through hours of dense video content.
Instead, you'll receive concise, potent insights, strategies and tools that you can start using right away.
Because when dealing with chronic pain, every moment counts. You don't need fluff; you need actionable steps that truly transform your day-to-day life together.
And the beauty is, many of these strategies require surprisingly little energy, yet they can bring about profound changes in your relationship.
Wondering what results you can achieve?
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"Instead of pain controlling and wearing us down, we use the practical and time saving tools that allow us to focus on everything else that matters."
Program Graduate
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"I wondered what a program could really teach me, but I was really surprised and now very thankful! I found a new normal, self-compassion and unique ways to improve our relationship!"
Program Graduate
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"I'm so grateful for this program. It's allowed us to believe in and rebuild our bond. We have increased understanding and appreciation for each other!"
Program Graduate
Access Now
One Time Payment
$199
USD
The Chronic Pain Couple Self-Paced Program
Unlimited Lifetime Access
Personal Program Portal
Practical Tools & Strategies
Module #1:
New Foundations - Getting on the Same Team
In the words of author Steve Paraboli, “It’s not you vs me, it’s us vs the problem.”
It’s a problem we’re both up against - so this first module gets you both on the same page.
Now, if you find your partner isn’t “bought in” yet - that’s perfectly okay. Around 60% of the time, I found myself working with the partner in pain.
Not only is it still possible to complete this program, but it’s quite common that partners begin to notice changes and re-engage with the relationship and working together on this.
It’ll take you a couple sessions to make your way through this. But once it’s done, the insights and tools you gain are lifelong.
You’ll discover:
The missing piece in your chronic pain treatment that’s holding you back (and what to do about it)
Concrete steps that bring you and your partner together - ready to conquer any challenge you face, hand in hand (even if you both feel so drained there’s nothing left to give)
Empowering Pain Insights - harness the latest in pain science to gain more control over your pain
Your personalised fasttrack to enjoying more happiness in spite of pain
A Stress-Free Home - the 5 pivotal questions that instantly clear your home-life of pain-related stress
And much more…
By the end of this module, you'll have laid a robust foundation for the rest of the program. More importantly, you'll start experiencing the transformative power of unity, catching glimpses of the incredible relationship both of you truly deserve.
Module #2:
Communication Hacks
Your partner walks through the door after a long day at work - both of you uncertain about the emotional landscape you’re stepping into.
Is disappointment right around the corner when they find out your pain levels or that you need to cancel plans?
Will it be another evening dominated by conversations about pain and capacity? Replaying the same draining dialogues that overshadow the love and joy you once shared so effortlessly.
Now, fast forward a few weeks:
Your partner comes through that same door, but this time it’s different.
The anxiety and stress over what’s in store for you both? Gone.
The repetitive problem solving? Gone.
Even with pain there, it no longer dictates the rhythm of your relationship.
No matter your pain level, you both know exactly how to handle it in the best way possible - without ever needing to say a word about it.
It’s hard to believe the relief as pain fades into the background and you begin to enjoy space for what’s meaningful to you both.
How did you get here? That's what Module 2 is all about.
If you’ve ever heard generic advice like, “communicate with your partner about what you want” - that’s NOT what this is.
What it is is a practical step-by-step guide that puts an end to the stressful communication that’s been stifling your intimacy and closeness.
The goal is NOT to communicate better - though you’ll find that you do as a byproduct - it’s to wipe out all the stressful and draining communication related to pain or chronic illness in a way that allows you both to go back to a life filled with joy and fun.
You’ll find yourself able to communicate with love even when energy is low, and shift the focus from health-centric conversations to ones that bring enjoyment and intimacy.
Plus, I’ll also show you how to resolve conflict at record speed. Because the truth is: you don’t have the time and energy for dragged out arguments, so you want to spend as little time on this as possible and get back to feeling connected again.
By the end of this module, which you can complete in under an hour, you'll find that you and your partner naturally begin to understand and support each other better, making room for romance and joy.
And then before you know it, you’ll notice the way you communicate has completely transformed.
In this transformative module, you'll:
Dive into strategies that infuse more energy, time, capacity, fun and romance into your life and relationship
Master energy-efficient ways to communicate about pain without compromising on being heard or supported (say goodbye to those draining conversations that left you both feeling more distant)
Turn tech into your ally - modern apps to live like pain isn’t there
Equip yourself with effortless techniques that reduce tension & defuse conflict - so you can get back to loving and supporting each other
Discover the “scheduling hack” that grants you time and energy for healing and the things you love most
And much more…
Let’s face it, all couples would benefit from this module. But for you, it could be the key to reclaiming the joy and intimacy that chronic pain has stolen.
Module #3:
Mind Matters + The Other Side - Emotional Wellbeing for Both Partners
Let's face it: chronic pain doesn't just affect you physically; it takes a toll on your emotional well-being. In fact, the current definition of chronic pain includes ‘unpleasant emotional experiences’.
That's why this module is designed to empower both you and your partner emotionally, so you can break free from the vicious cycle of pain and emotional distress.
In fact, this is often the module that has the most transformative impact on both partners.
First, let’s focus on YOU.
You're probably no stranger to the emotional challenges that come with chronic pain.
Anxiety, depression, and stress not only amplify your pain (and vice versa) but also make it harder for you to connect with your partner.
But what if you could break free from this relentless loop? What if you could reclaim your emotional balance and, in turn, improve your relationship?
Here's a glimpse of what you’ll find:
Breaking Chains of Negative Thinking: how to combat persistent negative thoughts with research-backed strategies.
Get your hands on the one worksheet that fast tracks you to acceptance & your ideal relationship (and life!).
The 3 Mantras that bust you out of a negative space and help you be a more easy-going and fun-loving partner.
A key piece of the “how to be a more joyful partner” puzzle - this has created a LOT of change in my own personal journey with chronic pain (as well as my relationship)
A 2-minute exercise that fast tracks you to acceptance & your ideal relationship (and life!).Now, let’s talk about your partner.
Remember, they’re on this emotional rollercoaster with you.
Maybe they’re doing their best to support you. Perhaps they’re feeling so drained and resentful that they seem to be completely "checked out" right now.
Whatever the case, it’s likely they’re wrestling with guilt, compassion fatigue, burnout from caring or having to work more, and so on. Just like you, they’re deserving of understanding and support.
Not only is this easier than you think, it can be like magic for your relationship.
Here’s what’s in it for them:
Navigating Emotional Highs and Lows: Understand the emotional rollercoaster your partner is on and how they can avoid caregiver burnout.
Freedom from Guilt: Practical exercises that free your partner from the shackles of guilt, making room for a healthier emotional connection.
How to guard yourselves from the emotional drain of “the gap” (far too many couples slip into this)
By the end of this module, you'll be navigating the emotional intricacies of chronic pain in a way you never imagined was possible for you, ensuring both you and your partner thrive emotionally and mentally.
Module #4:
Intimacy - Reigniting the Spark
Look, I get it. Right now, the very idea of intimacy might feel like a distant fantasy or the last thing on your mind. For many couples, it’s almost out of the question when getting started.
But here’s the thing: by the time you reach this module, you’ll already be experiencing the transformation in your relationship.
So at this point, you’ll practically be begging me for this information.
Fun fact: early in my journey, I had a chat with my physio about the hip brace I wore due to pain. I casually mentioned how it was not good for my relationship and sex life. You know what he said?
He asked me if I had any lace.
LACE!
He thought gluing lace to the brace would somehow magically enhance my intimacy with my partner.
While it's amusing in hindsight, it highlights the lack of understanding many have about this delicate intersection of pain and intimacy.
Rest assured, the insights you'll gain here are far more grounded and effective.
In this module, you’ll discover the 3 barriers to intimacy and how to address each of them…
1. Lack Of Desire
People don’t realize how our sexual response mechanism works when we have chronic pain.
Chronic pain is one of the body’s ways to signal something is wrong. So it’s not a matter of increasing your libido or desire, it’s your body slamming the brakes because it doesn’t feel safe.
If you’re running from a bear, your body isn't exactly rolling out the red carpet for romance.
Understanding this dynamic is crucial, as it reframes the narrative from a lack of interest to a protective response.
You’ll discover what blocks desire and the tools for safely releasing the brakes so desire can flow naturally once more.
2. Sex Is Painful
The dread of pain during intimate moments can leave you feeling hopeless and helpless - especially when it outweighs any pleasure.
You’ll get the techniques and approaches that release pain’s grasp on your romantic life, so you can finally enjoy that closeness once more.
3. Partner Feels Undesired Or Unloved
Sex is more than just physical connection, it’s a bonding experience that creates emotional connection.
When one partner consistently declines advances or doesn't initiate, it can sow seeds of doubt and feelings of being unloved. You’ll be guided through this emotional chasm, ensuring you both feel valued and connected.
You’ll also discover:
A comprehensive resource list for painful sex - there is hope!
Top 5 low-energy ways to show love to your partner
The common myths about pain and intimacy affecting your sex life
How to navigate partner’s different intimacy expectations and needs
Strategies to beat fatigue & enjoy sex despite pain.
By the end of this module, you'll have a roadmap to reignite both physical and emotional intimacy. This isn't about setting unrealistic expectations but providing a natural path to rediscover closeness and connection
Module #5:
My New Normal - Building a Brighter Future
By the time you reach this module, you'll be amazed at the transformation that has taken place. The landscape of your relationship and life will have shifted dramatically.
In fact, there are two reasons this final module came to exist:
It was born out of a recurring question from individual partners and couples who completed the program and reclaimed not just their time, energy, and emotional health, but also their aspirations for the future: “what comes next?”,
And once you’ve moved beyond merely surviving each day, you’ll likely find yourself yearning to pick those big goals and dreams off the shelf again. Whether it’s traveling, pursuing a passion, reigniting a career, or simply enjoying life’s moments more fully - this module will guide you on how to embrace your aspirations once more.
A number of people have asked how I managed to write a book, speak at conferences, and run multiple companies - all while being a wife, mother, and navigating significant chronic illnesses. In this module, you’ll discover the strategies that make it possible for me, and will allow you to expand your own horizons.
And while it might seem impossible now, when you’re focused on just getting back to "normal" - this is where we dare to dream bigger. This is where we revisit those dreams and aspirations that were shelved for "after we get through this."
You'll explore strategies for building an incredible relationship that continues to flourish as you journey through treatments.
Dive deep into purpose, passion, and goals, ensuring that every day is a step closer to your dreams. Assess your limitations and opportunities, giving you a clear roadmap for the future.
You’ll discover techniques to ensure you achieve your goals, regardless of pain levels. Celebrate the changes you've made, consolidating your progress and setting the stage for future success.
By the end of this module, you'll have a clear vision of the future, one where chronic pain doesn't stand in the way of your dreams. You'll have the tools and strategies to ensure that you and your partner continue to thrive, building a future that's filled with joy, purpose, and passion.
Until recently, the only way to access this transformative program was by working 1-on-1 with me, which came with a premium price tag of $2,500…
The results were nothing short of miraculous, but there were two glaring issues:
1. Such an investment wasn't feasible for everyone, no matter how much they needed it.
2. It dramatically limited the number of couples I could help.
Recognizing these challenges, I took it upon myself to redesign the program.
Drawing from the invaluable insights gained from helping numerous couples and the proven strategies employed in the program I crafted a version that's not only more accessible but also empowers couples to achieve remarkable results at their own pace.
Now, you might be thinking that such a comprehensive program would still cost a fortune.
But here's the twist: You can unlock this new chapter in your relationship for a one-time investment of just $199.
To put that into perspective: that's the cost of just ONE couples psychology session or a visit to a specialist. And consider this: while many couples benefit from up to 8 traditional therapy sessions, those sessions often don't address the unique challenges posed by chronic pain and fatigue. This program offers actionable solutions tailored to those specific needs.
It's no wonder that physicians regularly refer their patients to this program so that they can get this missing piece of their treatment handled. They see its value in providing practical workarounds that bridge the gap until healing is found, making the journey easier to bear, both personally and as a couple.
So, if you're ready to transform your relationship and navigate the challenges of chronic pain with newfound strength and understanding, this is your golden ticket. And at such a price, it's practically a steal.
And to make this decision even easier...
Your Investment In The Chronic Pain Couple Program Is Backed By A 30-Day 100% Money Back Guarantee
I'm confident you'll be thrilled as your relationship begins to shift in a matter of days.
And as you delve deeper into the modules and strategies...
You'll find yourselves naturally growing closer, understanding each other better, and rediscovering the joy in your relationship - even amidst the challenges of chronic pain.
However, if after genuinely trying the quick exercises and implementing the strategies, you feel this program isn't making a difference in your relationship...
Simply send an email to my support team, share with us your efforts and experiences with the exercises. Once we see you've genuinely given it a shot, we'll promptly refund your full investment.
No extra hoops or hurdles. Just a heartfelt request: give it a genuine try.
That's because I wholeheartedly believe in the transformative power of the Chronic Pain Couple program, but I also believe in the power of commitment.
So, if you're ready to discover just how remarkable your relationship can get - go ahead and get started today.
But don't let this pass you by.
This is your pivotal moment.
Every day you don’t take action, you’re not just denying yourself happiness and connection.
You’re letting those moments of potential joy, intimacy and understanding slip through your partner’s fingers too.
Consider this your beacon of hope. A way to reconnect and rediscover the love that chronic pain has overshadowed for too long.
So will you make a small but pivotal commitment to yourself and your partner and the relationship you once shared… and choose to give The Chronic Pain Couple program a shot?
Take the high-leverage strategies couples are currently using to live their best life together despite illness and pain…
And let them turn your relationship around.
Imagine how things will finally start to change…
From feeling distant and distracted... to enjoying each other’s company without reservations.
From every disagreement leading to tension... to swiftly transforming conflicts into moments of understanding and drawing closer.
From feeling drained and disconnected... to rekindling excitement and joy in your life together.
From life being dominated by pain and discomfort... to freeing up space and energy for connection, intimacy, and fun.
From endless discussions about pain... to engaging in joyful conversations that bring you closer.
From enduring the Patient-Carer dynamic… to standing side by side, facing every challenge and celebrating every joy together
From feeling isolated in your struggle... to facing challenges hand in hand, stronger than ever.
From feeling misunderstood and alone... to enjoying empathy, compassion and true connection
From missing out on life’s pleasures… to embracing joy, laughter, and adventure together.
From fearing intimacy due to pain... to trusting and enjoying each other's touch once again.
From feeling powerless and overwhelmed... to embracing a newfound sense of control, optimism, and the belief that things can indeed be better.
It happened for us. It happened for countless other couples. Now it’s your turn…
By clicking below and committing to this program, you're sending a powerful message to your partner: "You matter. We matter. I'm ready to invest in us."
It’s amazing how much a supporting partner feels loved just from someone with pain going “I’m doing this program for us.”
So go ahead, it’s time to stop letting pain define your relationship... and begin writing your own love story, free from limitations.
Can’t wait to hear your success story!
Karra
Access Now
One Time Payment
$199
USD
The Chronic Pain Couple Self-Paced Program
Unlimited Lifetime Access
Personal Program Portal
Practical Tools & Strategies
Still have questions?
If you have a specific question that isn’t addressed, please don’t let that stop you from taking the next step. Please contact me below for answers.
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